Top 5 Questions to Ask Before You Invent Another Edgy Rogue with Parental Issues

Oct 31

Mike’s Rant

Ah, welcome back, lad.

Let me guess. Yer new character’s a rogue. They don’t trust nobody. Always sit with their back to the wall. Only speak in gravel and metaphors. Got a scar across one eye. Don’t remember how they got it. Or worse — they do, and they’ll monologue about it while cleanin’ a dagger by the fire.

Their parents? Dead. Obviously. Or worse — alive, but cruel, absent, nobles, or possibly villains.

And let me guess... they don’t talk about it.

Except constantly.

BY GRABGAR’S HAMMER, THIS LAD’S ENTIRE PERSONALITY IS JUST “BROODING IN CORNERS.”

Now, don’t get me wrong. I love a good rogue. Played a few meself. But if yer whole character’s just darkness and daddy issues — it might be time to ask yerself a few questions before yer GM has to break out the therapy dice.

1. Can My Character Laugh? Or Do They Only Smirk in Pain?

If the answer is no — if the most levity yer rogue shows is a single pained chuckle before goin’ silent again — then we’ve got ourselves a walkin’ funeral in leather armor.

Give the lad one thing that brings ‘em joy. A favorite food. A dumb superstition. A stupid hobby. Something that proves they’re not made of gloom and cloak threads.

Look at The Goblin Cleric Who Hates Healing But Does It Anyway. That bastard’s miserable — but funny. Makes a difference.

2. Is the “Tragic Past” Goin’ Anywhere? Or Is It Just Window Dressin’?

Yer rogue don’t remember what happened in the orphanage. But they will bring it up every session.

Don’t just drop trauma like breadcrumbs — build toward somethin’. Revenge? Redemption? Reconnection? If yer past ain’t changin’ yer present, then it ain’t story — it’s fluff.

And no, "I don’t trust anyone" ain’t a plot arc. That’s just bein’ a grump.

Need help turnin’ character flaws into real growth? Try When the Story Matters to You — But They’re Just Here for the Fights. Might give ya a hint on playin’ with purpose.

3. Does My Rogue Have a Second Emotion Besides “Brooding”?

Let’s check yer range:

Brooding
Sulking
Glowering
Brooding again but louder

Congratulations — yer a haunted smoke cloud with a dagger.

Try anger. Try guilt. Try joy. Try embarrassment. A rogue who gets flustered? That’s gold.

Even The Sorceress Who Glows Like a Villain But Fights Like a Hero has a full emotional palette, and she’s lit up like a cursed chandelier.

If Yer Edge Ain’t Softened Somewhere, It’s Just a Wall

Let the table in, lad. A little. Let yer rogue open up once in a while — even if it’s awkward. Especially if it’s awkward.

👉 Want more help balancin’ yer edgy backstory with real character beats? Read No, Yer Character Doesn’t Need Another Flashback — and maybe toss a torch into the vault o’ trauma once in a while.

4. Do Other Players Know How to Roleplay With Me — Or Are They Just Guessin’?

If yer rogue never shares, never reacts, never initiates, then guess what? Yer teammates don’t know what yer doin’. Or how to do anything with ya.

Give ‘em something. A belief. A bond. A rumor. A tell. Let them engage.

Don’t be so mysterious yer party forgets yer there.

Want to learn how to connect, even when playin’ weird builds? Look at The Paladin Who Can’t Lie But Carries a Shield That Does. That lad’s complicated — but accessible.

5. Does My Rogue Want Anything That Ain’t Vengeance, Gold, or Silence?

Is there a goal? A wish? A dream? Or just a series o’ sneers and stabs?

Even a broken thief can want somethin’ small — a cottage, a name cleared, a pet rat named Scamp. Give yer rogue something human. Otherwise, they’re just a ghost with backstabs.

Look through Tavern Etiquette and you’ll see it plain — the best players build characters that others want to spend time with.

Your Rogue Can Be Broken. But Let ‘Em Want to Heal

Let yer character grow. Let ‘em change. Let the party matter to them.

👉 Contact the Tavern if yer not sure how to build that into yer next rogue. Or check the FAQ to figure out if yer backstory’s workin’ for or against ya.