Yer Cleric Ain’t a Walking Health Potion
Let me say it plain: if yer entire healing plan is “the cleric’s got it,” yer party’s dumber than a rust monster in a blacksmith’s shop. I’ve seen better survival tactics from goblins on fire.
I once ran with a group where the cleric got knocked out in round one. The wizard panicked and tried to stabilize him with a love letter. The fighter used “medicine” like it was a hammer. And the bard... the bard started composing a dirge. Mid-battle.
So if ya think healing’s not your job, lemme ask: what happens when the healer’s down, ya ale-spillin’, scroll-burnin’, bandage-forgettin’ surface dweller?!
“If Yer Plan Is ‘Cleric Will Fix It,’ Ya Don’t Have a Plan”
👉 Want to stay alive when your healer drops faster than a halfling on marbles? Mike’s Tavern has yer cure for stupidity:
https://www.mikes-tavern.com/player-tip
https://www.mikes-tavern.com/about-mikes-tavern
What Healing Really Looks Like
1. Carry the Damn Potion
Every player should have at least one healing potion. If not? Ya might as well slap a bullseye on yer chest and ask the orc to aim there.
And don’t just buy it — use it. Too many fools go, “But what if I need it later?” Lad, you are on fire. The “later” is now.
Need a survival-focused build? Start here:
👉 The Goblin Cleric Who Hates Healing but Does It Anyway
2. Know How to Stabilize
You don’t need divine magic to keep someone from bleedin’ out. The Medicine check exists. Use it. Patch ‘em up. Stuff socks in the wound if ya have to. Just do something.
Don’t forget to read this etiquette article too, or you'll end up like the rogue who bandaged a throat wound with rope:
👉 https://www.mikes-tavern.com/tavern-etiquette
3. Prevention Is the Best Cure
Sometimes the best “healing” is just not being dumb. Don’t stand in acid. Don’t open cursed boxes. And if the druid says “don’t eat that,” don’t eat that.
And if you do? Don’t blame the healer when yer belly sprouts fangs.
Want to avoid stupid traps and bad builds? Look here:
👉 The Sorceress Who Glows Like a Villain but Fights Like a Hero
Real Adventurers Bring Bandages (and Brains)
👉 If you can’t cast Cure Wounds, then carry tools. Heal with brains, not just spells. Learn the ways of survival the Mike way:
https://www.mikes-tavern.com/contact
https://www.mikes-tavern.com/faq
Let’s Talk About the Backup Plan
When your cleric’s unconscious, dead, or busy smiting evil with both hands, ya still need healing options.
Rangers and Druids can heal. Use ‘em.
Bards can heal. (If they’re not too busy flirting with statues.)
Paladins can Lay on Hands — if they remember to save charges.
Anyone can use scrolls, potions, and kits if they ain't completely daft.
IF YER ONLY PLAN IS “HEALER WILL HEAL,” THEN I HOPE YER NEXT CHARACTER KNOWS FIRST AID, YA TORCH-SNUFFIN’, POTION-FORGITTIN’, HOPE-SWILLIN’ MIMIC KISSER!!
…Whew. That felt good.
FAQ
Q: Can non-healers really help in healing?
A: Absolutely. Use potions, scrolls, kits, even the damn Medicine skill. If ya’ve got hands, ya can stop a bleed.
Q: What’s the best way to support the cleric?
A: Don’t make ‘em babysit ya. Protect ‘em. Flank for ‘em. Heal them if they drop. Don’t just yell, “CLERIC!!” every five seconds like a goblin stuck in a mousetrap.
Q: Should every character carry healing items?
A: YES. If yer not carryin’ at least one potion, yer not playin’ smart — yer playin’ dead.
