The Fight’s Not Epic If It’s Boring: How to Speed Up Combat Without Butchering It
“By Harnak’s shattered pickaxe, if this ‘epic’ boss battle drags on any longer, I’ll need a second beard ta make it through.”
There was a time, lad, when a boss fight meant somethin’. A black dragon stormin’ through a crumblin’ cathedral. A lich raisin’ fallen kings while the paladin screamed prayers into the void. And then… it all went to sludge.
Four hours later, we’re still rollin’ initiative, countin’ legendary actions, and arguin’ whether the mage’s cone o’ cold hits two skeletons or three. Ain’t nothin’ epic about a slog. Not in my tavern.
I once had a party take three sessions to kill a beholder. Three. I could’ve built a dungeon, raised a goat, and mined a fresh tunnel by then. And no, the players weren’t bein’ slow. I was the fool. Too many hit points. Too many condition immunities. Too many damn ideas crammed into one beast like a pie with too many fillings — sounded good, tasted awful.
So if yer players are yawning mid-fight, if yer “legendary” encounter feels more like a homework scroll — let’s sharpen that axe and carve it lean.
Not Every Fight Deserves a Statue and a Song
👉 Want fights that feel big without breakin’ yer table’s spirit? The best tactics, shortcuts, and roastings are waitin’ on the GM Wisdom scroll rack. And if yer fightin’ burnout from slow sessions, throw yer concerns at the wall over at Mike’s contact page — I’ll shout back with advice and maybe a mug o’ tough love.
How to Speed Up Combat — Without Guttin’ the Drama
1. Cut the Fat, Keep the Fire
Every fight don’t need a 20-page boss doc. Ask yerself:
Is this fight important to the story or just the XP?
Will anyone remember this encounter a month from now?
If the answer’s “No” — make it fast, make it flashy, move on.
Use monsters from The Count of Thorneblight or Thorneblight Village to flavor yer speed fights. Lean on lore — not mechanics.
2. Embrace the “Bloodied” Rule
At half health, give a monster a twist: a scream, a mutation, a final move. Then hint to the players it’s nearly over. They’ll tighten their grip. You’ll keep the tension. And no one needs a calculator to figure out what’s left.
3. Hit Hard, Die Fast
Don’t fear glass cannons. A monster that smacks hard and dies quick often feels more dangerous than one that chips away forever. The Emberhook Blade ain't subtle — read what a deadly weapon should feel like, then build yer boss with that bite in mind.
4. Let Environmental Hazards Do the Work
Let the terrain carry some of the tension. Fire pits, collapsing floors, cursed relics — even Briarbone Manor has mechanics baked into its bones. Give ‘em something to dodge besides claws.
5. End It With Drama
Let the final round explode — a countdown timer, a last stand, a twisted choice. Don’t just reduce hit points to zero. Make ‘em feel the win.
I once ended a fight with a cursed knight offerin’ his blade mid-fall. "Finish the fight, or take my burden." The paladin took it. The campaign twisted like a rusted hinge after that.
6. Don’t Let Epic Become Excess
Look — yer job ain’t to fill time. Yer job is to tell tales. Not every tale needs a war. Sometimes, a knife in the alley does more than a dragon in the sky.
Big Doesn’t Mean Long — It Means Memorable
👉 If yer epic fight’s flatter than a goblin’s ale keg, it ain’t the monster’s fault. Rebuild the mood, not just the mechanics. And if yer players still ain’t feelin’ it, check the About page to learn why Mike’s Tavern is where bad combat comes to get fixed — and turned into legend.
Recommended Reading While Yer Axe Cools:
FAQ
Q: Can I still use legendary actions without slowing things down?
A: Aye, but trim the fat. One good reaction beats three weak ones. Keep it punchy.
Q: What if players want “cinematic” fights but take forever to act?
A: Remind ‘em that cinema has editors. They get spotlight — not soliloquies.
Q: Should I end fights early if they’re dragging?
A: If the party’s winnin’ and everyone’s done feelin’ tense — yes. End with a flourish, not a whimper.
